Let’s Have the First Date in a Park!
Relax; this is not an experience I have had; only an experience an amateur matchmaker tried to arrange for me.
Not that I have anything against dating in a park. Provided the weather is good, and the location isn’t one where you are likely to greet half a million acquaintances. Also, I have some old-fashioned notion that a FIRST date should take place indoors.
The amateur matchmaker in this case happens to be a relative of the guy, and one rather eager to see him married, so I don’t suspect her in trying to sabotage the shidduch from the very beginning. But all the same, let’s say I agreed with her suggestion to date the guy in the main park of the small town I work in, and to which he has comfortable public transportation.
“But it’s winter now!” was the first thing I exclaimed when hearing about this extraordinary idea.
“Well’” says Mom, the faithful go-between (she knows better than to let me butt heads with respectable ladies who red shidduchim), “she says she jog every evening and the weather is perfectly pleasant”. Not that my mother is trying to influence me, you understand: as mild as the Israeli winter is (it’s currently about 21 °C degrees in the area in question, 12 °C at night), she knows that her daughter is taking to wearing parkas the minute the temperature drops below 26 °C.
So, if the date takes place, I will be this bulky figure in scarf, mittens, hat, sweater, long coat and boots. And half of the time I will be skipping and jumping to keep myself warm. Very fetching, of course.
Then there is the question of privacy. I am not unduly bothered with keeping my dates secret. If somebody I know happens to see me, I can wave at them and that is that. Never saw the point in being embarrassed in these situations, unless you are dating two guys at the same time and have been caught red-handed. But I work in a small town, where most of the company employees live, and chances are I will meet not one, but quite a few men and women from my workplace either while enjoying the wonders of the local park or while leaving it, thanks to its central location. And I don’t want my coworkers getting into planning my wedding even more enthusiastically that they have done no far. I have learned by experience that they must be given no encouragement.
If that is not enough, I can’t behave myself in a park. Show me trees, greenery, and comfortable benches, and all I want to do is curl up with a book, feeling that nature, after all, isn’t too different from my room at home. Which means that after I have become warm enough (or despaired from getting so), and if the conversation becomes tiresome, I will discreetly try to pull a book out of my bag. That should serve as a good hint to the guy.
Not very nice, I agree, but then, a date in the park can’t really call for the regular dating etiquette, can it?
Hmmm…Perhaps I should rethink this suggestion. It seems my refusal, after all, was a bit too quick. Or too charitable!
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